Figuring It Out
by Sleepyhead1207
Summary: What could have happened if there were no letters and if Jax and Tara were able to escape the club and Charming.


**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. Sadly.

**Summary:** What could have happened if there were no letters, and Jax and Tara were able to escape the club and Charming.

Oh, and Ima? She went the way of the Dodo after season three. (A girl can dream, right?)

* * *

Tara wiped her brow with the back of her hand for what seemed like the millionth time that day. She was currently unpacking the remainder of the dishes into the cupboards of her new kitchen. Despite the normally cool May weather for Medford, Oregon, it had reached a sweltering 82 degrees that day, and all of the unpacking and shuffling around the new house had only made the heat seem more intense.

She couldn't complain at all, though. Finally, after all the time she had spent fantasizing about a life with Jax away from Charming, it was a reality. Providence Hospital had offered her a job, with a huge pay bump to boot, and to her surprise, Jax hadn't put up a fight. He was actually really supportive. The dangers that came along with the club's new relationship with the Galindo Cartel were all the encouragement he needed to part with the club once and for all.

Tara's stomach churned, and she visibly shuddered as she recalled the rival cartel's warning to the Sons that came in the form of a bag of heads being hand-delivered to Teller-Morrow.

"You ok?"

The memory of that day melted away as Tara was brought back to the present by the worried voice of Opie's Old Lady Lyla, who was leaning against the open entryway to the kitchen. The pair had arrived that morning to help their friends setup the new house.

Tara let out a small laugh and gave a reassuring smile as she leaned against the granite counter. "Yeah, I think I'm just a little overheated." The last thing she wanted to do was bring up that memory, especially since she knew Lyla still had to worry about her husband's involvement with the cartel.

"Well, need any help in here? I finished the living room and cleared out the empty boxes."

The sweet smile currently on her face and the readiness at which she had volunteered herself and Opie to help in the move made Tara regret the way she had initially treated her. Without the other couple's help, there would have been no way she and Jax could have had their new two story house practically all set up in three days.

Gemma hadn't said anything about helping them move in. It stung her that Jax would leave, especially since her world revolved around her grandchildren. Tara guessed that that would be one wound that wouldn't heal quickly. "Actually, if you could help me put away these dishes, then I think we'll be done with the kitchen. And have I expressed my complete and utter gratitude for your help with all this?"

Lyla chuckled and sauntered over to the open cardboard box on the counter next to Tara and began pulling out plates. "Not in the last hour. Besides, Opie and I get to spend tonight away from the kids in your guest bedroom. Trust me, I should be thanking you." Lyla and Opie had been drifting further and further away from each other. Everyone in the club could tell, so Tara was glad the married couple could get a night away from Charming.

"Just remember that the guest bedroom is right next to Abel's room. Try not to scare him."

Lyla turned to Tara and solemnly put her hand over her heart. "I promise to do my best so your child doesn't hear us christening the room."

Tara let out a sly smile. "The christening has already been taken care of." It had occurred the previous night. More than once in fact, which was usually the case with their lovemaking.

"Well I'm not surprised! This is your third day here, so I'm sure you and the prince have had sex all over this place by now."

"I knew the conversation would be much better in here."

Tara and Lyla turned to the doorway and faced a grinning Jax who was holding a sleepy looking Abel. "Didn't daddy tell you that, big guy? While me and your Uncle Ope do all the heavy lifting our Old Lady's are planning on even more ways they can take advantage of us tonight." Abel seemed completely disinterested in what his father was saying and more intent on using Jax's shoulder as a pillow.

Tara rolled her eyes but couldn't help but give him a huge grin. Lyla had been right. Since they had arrived at the new house, Jax had been adamant that they have sex everywhere and not just in the confines of the master bedroom. He argued that as new homeowners, they held the responsibility of christening the new house. Everywhere. According to him, it was basically mandatory.

That was actually the reason it had taken her two days to unload only two boxes of dishes. Jax had suddenly attacked her with his mouth and hands when she began unpacking them the previous day, and after that, no more work had been accomplished.

She was hardly complaining, though. After all this time he still had the power to make her go weak in the knees. Besides the fact that he was incredibly sexy and had only gotten more so since high school, he turned into an amazing father capable of letting her all the way in emotionally and without fear of being vulnerable. Sometimes it was still hard to believe he was all hers.

"Oh please, you two cavemen enjoy showing off your manly strength any chance you get." Lyla walked towards Jax and removed the sleepy child from his arms. "Come on, Abel. Let's go put you down for a nap in your new bedroom."

As Lyla walked out of the kitchen and up the stairs, Jax approached Tara and rested his hands on her hips and inched her body closer to his. She leaned her forehead against his and closed her eyes, enjoying their first moment alone all day. "Did you and Opie finish the nursery?"

Hungry for closer contact, Jax enveloped her fully into his arms and breathed in her scent. "Mmhmm," he murmered softly into her hair.

Tara wrapped her arms around him and smiled. She loved how she felt so small in his arms. So fragile, yet so protected and safe. She always felt this way with him. No matter what could be going on around them, the second he held her she felt secure . That's why she hadn't thought twice about calling him instead of the police that night with Kohn. Not only was that the most frightened she had ever been for her life, but she was also scared because she had never shot someone, even though he had given her no choice. But as soon as she opened the door that night and saw Jax, she immediately knew it would be okay.

Jax pulled back and brushed the loose hair that had escaped from her ponytail out of her face. He leaned in and kissed her long and firm. Tara, not wanting it to end, reached her hands up to the sides of his face and kept his head pressed against hers. That action urged Jax on, and he lifted Tara up by her waist and set her so she was sitting on the counter, causing her to give out a surprised squeal.

His kissing grew more passionate and fervent, and his hands traveled underneath the back of her shirt, resting on her tattoo. Tara had told Gemma that day in the hospital that the reason she kept it there was so she would know everything it represented was behind her. Part of that was true. She really did want to move on from a small town life in Charming. She always wanted more out of life, and if she stayed in that same place, then that would never happen. But she'd be lying if she said she that was the only reason she kept it. If she was being honest the main reason she left it there was because of the man she never could let go.

Jax, of course, loved the fact that it was still there. He told her that merely the sight of it was enough to get him going, and Tara could tell by the way his fingers started tracing the outlines of the tattoo he knew by memory that currently, that was definitely the case. Just as she began wondering how far they could take their little makeout session with their friends and children only upstairs, a sudden cry from the baby monitor resting on the kitchen table interrupted her thoughts.

Jax pulled away and looked down at her, a smile playing on his lips. "My boys, the masters of timing."

Tara let out a small laugh and removed herself from her sitting position on the counter. Both Thomas and Abel had a knack for knowing when things between their parents were starting to heat up. "He's probably hungry. I better go feed him."

He gave her a mischievous smile. "Can I watch?"

"I mean from his bottle, Teller. As much as it pains you, Thomas doesn't breastfeed anymore."

Before she could walk away, he pulled her once again against his chest again and nipped at her lips. "Such a shame. I guess you can make it up to me later."

Tara had no doubt in her mind that's what would be happening later that night. One of the perks of Jax no longer being a part of SAMCRO was no more late night meetings at the clubhouse or nights when he was unable to come home at all because he and his brothers were off doing god knows what. At night he was all hers now, and it made her look forward to all that would entail.

She leaned back and brought her thumb up to trace his bottom lip. "We could arrange that."

Jax kissed her thumb before leaning in to give her a kiss on her nose. "I love you."

Tara immediately smiled and let bot her palms rest flat against his chest. "I love you too. So much." She took in a deep breath before she began again. "And I know I've said it before, but leaving Charming and the club was really brave of you. I know it's such a big part of who you are and has been the only thing you've ever known, so I want you to know that I realize this transition isn't going to be easy for you. That fact isn't lost on me."

Jax cupped her face and looked into her eyes, hoping his next words would sink in for her. "This was the right thing to do, Tara. My love for the club is nothing compared to my love for you and our boys, and I never would have forgiven myself if something were to happen to any of you because of that cartel shit. And you're right, being without my brothers is going to be hard, but I don't regret this choice for one second."

Tara smiled at his words and leaned up for one more kiss.

Part of her was afraid that Jax would start to resent her as he realized what life without the club would be like. Or maybe that he would start to feel useless or overshadowed as simply being thought of as 'the doctor's stay at home husband' or 'the mechanic married to the doctor'. He wasn't quite sure what his plans were going to be job-wise, but both of them knew there would still be people out there who thought Tara was his meal-ticket.

He was right when he told her the Sons would be making bank from the new deal with the Irish. Even though he hadn't stayed along for the full ride, his risk-taking had earned their family enough money so that they could live comfortably on it without Tara's salary in the mix for quite some time. She was just scared that as time went on it wouldn't be enough for him. Or that he would grow restless with a normal life and be drawn back into that world. It was all she could to do pray that would never happen.

* * *

Tara and Lyla finished going down the produce isle at the nearby grocery store and looked for the last of the food items they needed for dinner.

"You know, socially it's going to be pretty different for you here in Oregon." Lyla remarked as she stopped the cart to look at tomatoes.

"How so?"

"Well, in Charming everyone knew you were Jax Teller's Old Lady. No one would dare cross you for fear of what he or the club would do, and guys would especially not even think of hitting on you. Not if they were smart, anyway." Lyla paused and looked around. "That's not the case here."

Tara rolled her eyes. "Lyla, I'm a thirty-one year old mother of two. Just because I'm not in Charming doesn't mean guys are going to suddenly start lining up to hit on me."

"Tara, please. Obviously Jax loves you because of things beyond your looks, but don't fool yourself into thinking that isn't part of it. You don't exactly get the Prince of Charming wrapped around your finger by being anything less than desirable. I mean take those two guys over there." Lyla nodded her head to the left in the direction of two males.

Tara hadn't even noticed the two of them before Lyla had pointed them out. They were both fairly handsome, dark haired men who looked to be in about their late twenties. As soon as she had looked in their direction, they seemed to be conspicuously busying themselves with the fruit stand in front of them. Still, Tara was confused. "The guys looking at the melons?"

"Yes, the guys looking at melons. But not even a minute ago they were looking at your melons."

Her comment made Tara want to laugh at the absurdity of it. "Oh, please. They probably were looking at you. You _are_ the porn star here, remember?" Still, she absentmindedly pulled up her black tank top, which had been showing off more cleavage than she had realized.

Lyla let out a sigh and directed their cart towards the checkout line. "Trust me. I've been ogled enough to know when the improper thoughts are being directed my way, and that wasn't the case. Besides, without my push-up bra on, I'm not exactly working with much up here."

Tara wanted to retort back another denial about what Lyla thought she saw but opted for silence instead. It's not like she thought she wasn't attractive. She knew she was, but Lyla surely was exaggerating this sudden male attention she was going to have thrown her way. Yeah, she had been on the receiving end of a lot of male flirtation in college and in high school before her relationship with Jax began, but she was a mother now. And a surgeon, for crap's sake.

Her friend seemed to read her mind. "Just because you've given birth and are some fancy doctor doesn't mean guys aren't going to appreciate what they see."

"I'll keep that in mind." Tara was just ready to drop the subject.

"Hell, the whole doctor bit is probably more incentive. I mean, how many times has Jax made you play doctor on him?"

Lyla's question didn't even require an answer as Tara's face immediately turned bright red. Jax indeed had requested that on more than one occasion.

"Excuse me, miss?"

Tara's burning face looked away from Lyla and into the eyes of one of the men who Lyla had pointed out earlier. "Um, yes?" He was giving her a big grin, and Tara could tell this was probably about to get awkward.

His gaze seemed to land on her left hand, which was clutching tightly on the strap of her purse, before he continued. "My name's Charles." He paused, and it had taken Tara a few seconds to realize he was waiting for her to introduce herself.

"Oh, I'm Tara."

He gave a small, almost nervous laugh. "I like that name. Listen, I couldn't help but notice you earlier. This is definitely a little forward, but my friend and I were planning on cooking ourselves dinner tonight, and we were just discussing how we would enjoy cooking for you two lovely women more. Or if you're not free then another night."

Tara couldn't quite process what had just been said. She was kind of embarrassed more than a little dumbfounded. Lyla, of course, was amused by the whole thing. Looking was one thing, but to ask them out? She sure as hell hadn't expected that. And wasn't she wearing her engagement ring?

She briefly glanced down to double check she hadn't forgotten to put it on, but sure enough, there it was. Of course, this also made her a little indignant. What kind of guy would blatantly ask out someone with a ring on her finger in the middle of the goddamn grocery store?

She held up her left hand to emphasize its presence.

"Sorry." Her voice sounded anything but.

The guy smiled at her before shrugging. "Can't blame a guy for trying. I thought I'd at least ask. Anyway, have a good day, Tara. Hopefully I'll see you here some other time."

As he had his friend walked off, Lyla patted Tara on the shoulder. "Like I said, he wanted your melons."

Tara's face scrunched up, partially in confusion and partially in disgust. "Yeah, let's just keep this between you and me." Jax didn't need to know. The last thing she wanted was for him to have to think that not only leaving Charming meant that he wasn't part of SAMCRO anymore but that it also meant guys didn't know that the crow on her back meant she was spoken for by someone you didn't want to piss off.

"That would probably be best."


End file.
